he never really ask if whether I like the things I am doing now nor he will feel what its like to be lifeless, and cooped up at home. Whenever I say I want to go out, he will be definitely be scheduling MANY MANY things for me to do, whilst resting at his room, AND SEEING ME SLOGGING MY ARSE OFF.

I WANT MY LIFE, IT's FUCKING LIFELESS.

If I am gone like even for 1 minute, he will be asking where I am. Whereas my sister, gone like 10hours, he also wouldnt ask anything about it.

speechless. I dont like to go to those smokey place, with lots of hoochies and whores surrounding me. Makes me feel so filthy. Why meetings must be always drinking and going to such places? why cant you fcking hell meet at a lounge or something? To make it sound worse, I would prefer to go to a coffeeshop than those places. Fucked up.

I really miss those days when his not around. really. . . that is when i only get to feel what its like of "freedom". I really wish I can grow up faster, be independent and to tolerate his fucking attitude and temper. I wish I can attain my driving license in one try, and not be judged on. I dont want to listen to his craps everyday. Whenever he starts yanking, deep in my heart, I really pray that someone could just end my sorrows.

Many many people dont understand why I always dreaded holidays, this is why. I want to go to school, I want school to start this very second. And I can go to school everyday, and need not to face him and his crappy lectures.

ARH! nobody will really understand.